Abject Failure Equals Giveaway!

It may come as a complete surprise to you, but not everything I make is awesome. I know. Jump back, Jack. That’s crazytown.  In fact, and this is a huge secret so be cool, most of what I do is completely strugglesome. Hence the blog title. And I’m about to recount an abject failure which, hopefully, can make someone else happy, because it just makes me want to sob a little in the bathroom. Like you do.

Recently I’ve been very interested in perfecting a pencil skirt pattern for my body. But rather then draft my own from the several (many) tutorials online that teach you how, I’ve been trying to take the easy (stupid) way out and find a pattern that works for my body. Yeah. It has had mixed results. I’m might just have to break the hell down and draft a pattern, which I’m avoiding, because I’m a foolish coward. (Hangs head in shame).

So I recently downloaded the Angela Kane FREE PATTERN pencil skirt. I had some blue wool left over from my Not Everyone Can Be You dress, and it was just enough to squeeze out this skirt. I started sewing it when I got back on Monday from Puerto Rico, and got all the way up to sewing up the back seam. I tried it on, which is what I usually do at that point with a skirt, and, bam, literally split the seam. I SPLIT THE SEAM. Was it my hips? My waist? My thighs? Of course not. It’s was my (admittedly not un-prominent) rear. It was the junk in my trunk, people. Just like Lady Mary killed a Turkish diplomat with her virginity, I split a seam with my posterior.

Sighing with rage and disgust (and mindless anger at all the hours I spend at the gym which have, of late, slimmed my waist and toned my thighs but done very little, it seems, for my bottom) I tossed the skirt aside. But then I remembered that I literally cannot deal with not finishing a garment, it’s a compulsion. So I finished it. And I took more care with this damn skirt that fits my waist like a dream and my butt like a nightmare then I have with many other items that actually fit me fairly well. Well, except for the seam binding on the waistband, that I will freely admit is a mess. But STILL,  this is a french seamed wonder with an invisible zipper, neatly iron darts and a hand stitched hem. And I’m giving just giving it away.

That’s right, I’m giving this stupid beautiful skirt that doesn’t fit me away. You can have it, for FREE. Wanna see it?

Nice, right? Lovely color, hits the knees, nice drape on the 100% wool, it’s a winner.

It fits a 28 waist and a 36 hips (and rear, please take note), and while it’s not perfect (what is?) I think it’s a very nice skirt. For someone else. Because even with my Zumba class and Cardio Kickboxing, this thing isn’t going to pack my back any time soon.

So if you would like to own and wear this garment, just leave me a comment letting me know about a recent sewing failure and what, if anything, you did to try and vindicate it. Leave a comment by March 29th, so in three weeks, and I will announce the winner by April 1st! Have at it, people!

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13 Comments

Filed under Angela Kane, Clothing, Giveaway, Sewing

13 responses to “Abject Failure Equals Giveaway!

  1. my rear does not fit the profile, so i’m out. but i must say you have a lovely rear, in that, there should be no struggle!

  2. i won the last giveaway, so i wont push my luck 🙂 and my rear is too big as well.. but that color is amazing.. i already envy the lucky rear

  3. Sue

    I kidded myself I should enter, even though the skirt is about 1″ smaller than my physical waist/hip measurements…meaning I’m not entering, but wish I was. :-/ It’s a rather cute skirt and I do love the color.

    I, too, have dreams of perfecting a pencil skirt pattern to fit me perfectly, but have yet to give it much of a shot (i’m scared). PLEASE share what you do end up trying when you embark on your own perfect pencil skirt quest!

  4. Nell

    OH MY!!! I’ve been looking for a skirt like that in ages! Absolutely gorgeous color!

    My latest failure is my “DIY” US flag croped shorts… I accidentally painted its back red. Yes, on THAT place. 😀 and we all know what it means…hehe

    I haven’t tried anything since then, I am a failure=) Guess I should just leave it to the professionals:P

  5. Dita

    lovely! i dont really sew so no failure here:D

  6. I think you have a lovely rear 🙂 I definitely blame the pattern. I’m 28″ waist and 39″ rear if that’s any consolation.

    My big tip for creating a custom skirt pattern: cover yourself waist to hip in plastic wrap then wrap up in masking tape. Sorta like a duct tape dummy, not squishing yourself with the tape, but only use one or two layers. Mark the waist, CF, CB, side seams. Cut it off down the side seams and clip to create darts so that two pieces lie flat. This makes a perfectly you sized straight skirt pattern (minus ease and SA). Also great for altering existing patterns.

  7. This isn’t an abject failure! It will be lovely on someone else! And dude, not every pattern fits every person (but wouldn’t it be AWESOME if it did?! No alterations necessary!!). Better luck next time!

  8. My hips/ bum is 37″ I’d love to wear it but will my booty fit?

  9. Hmmm , won’t fit me either! I’m sure it will find a good home where someone can appreciate that lovely bright and soft looking wool. Last disaster? I made a shirt for my son where the arms were too long after I’d sewn the plackets on. So I lopped off about 4cm from the length and blithely sewed on the cuffs. Okay as long as he didn’t want to roll or push up the sleeves – which he does as soon as he puts on any shirt. I had to lengthen the placket through adding a ‘feature’ in the form of a bias cut strip and lots of careful handsewing. Won’t do that again, and not sure what possessed me in the first place.

  10. Amy

    I just found your website because you commented on mine, and I think I’m in love. We have the same measurements, and I say things like interwebs and crazytown all the time. Too funny!

    That color is gorgeous! I’m sorry it didn’t turn out.

  11. Pingback: And the Nominations are in! | Rocket Sews

  12. I’m about to try that pattern and just want to say you gave me a good laugh. Your skirt looks good.

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